I just went to the playground last night. I saw someone in the forest near the playground. First I didn’t care about it but I heard the foot step come close to me. They are cutthroat in the news!!!. I started to run my heart is started to beating faster than the wheel of speeding train. I ran as fast as lighting, I tried my best to escape this. Finally I arrive home, I looked back and now I see can’t anyone. But I still have a question if they didn’t come to my house…but where were they going then?
2 comments:
Great use of simile and metaphor Mark. I like the suspense created by using the question at the end - it makes me want to read on to find out the answer.
My only question would be, why were you in a playground near a forest at night?!
I agree that your similes make this vivid. Your writing is suspenseful--especially with the footsteps approaching. Keep writing.
Mrs. G. USA
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