Monday, 15 May 2017
My vacation in Hawaii
I excitedly opened my journal and I found pictures of my vacation in Hawaii. I will now reveal my story.One day I went to visit Hawaii zoo which at that time seemed to me a beautiful place I went to visit these strange crocodile and the crocodile looked at me.It slowly yawned and I could just tell that his mouth became so wide and it turned orange. Something happened, Definitely but I carried on walking and the bridge by the river apparently just collapsed I carried on walking and I saw fire within the building.What happened next?
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4 comments:
Great entry! I loved how you left everyone wondering what on earth will happen next! Next time, watch out for your punctuation.
:)
I really like your writing. I wonder what will happen next? If possible can you write what happen next?
Thanks faye. I now saw the mistakes thanks for correcting it!!
Hi Sophie I added what will happen next Because I wanted the audience to see the Image deeply and I added a rhetorical question because I wanted the audience to think about the question deeply.If I said what will happen next than it would have been more than 100 words.Sometimes you do not want to give a lot of details.
Thanks for commenting!!:)
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