Saturday, 29 April 2017
Sad story
He is a very distinguish captain, and he is very purposeful captain. One day, his ship met an enemy ship. The ship looks very powerful, but they don't have a lot of people, maybe only like 5-9 people. We have like 20-30 people, yet we don't have that much weapons to fight with them. We tried our best to avoid them but we can't, so we have only one choice is to fight, but our captain try his to avoid, so he went to other ship and try to negotiate with them and he never come back again...
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4 comments:
Mark use past tense, and better title, make it more exciting. And not too long sentence.
Could really use improving on the tense, because first your doing it in past tense then you do it in the present. But I like how you tried to describe stuff in your story.
Mark your story is interesting and you have included powerful adjective and I really like it.
I agree with your comment (you should change your title to something about pirates), but overall your story is very interesting and you put in lots of challenging words.
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