Friday, 12 May 2017

5 stars poison

I was eating some kind of shrimp  in 5 stars hotel, and after that I need to go the hospital. The doctor said the shrimp that I ate had poison inside the shrimp. I shouldn't eat it, I already know by the taste of, but my mother still want me to eat it just because it expensive. I just couldn't eat something so expensive for a while, not only that, I won't eat anything that's not from my mother because I couldn't trust the food from the stranger anymore. I just don't trust anyone apart from my mother.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Good work on remembering some of your tenses there Mark; "I ate has poison" and "I will not eat". Interesting idea, try and find the other verbs that need to change into the past tense for your paragraph to make sense.

Natty said...


I really like your story mark you have included good adjectives.

Anonymous said...

I agree with Mr.Tom, because your tense could really be improved but I still liked what you tried to do with the story